Rare copy number variations (CNVs) are a known genetic etiology in neurodevelopmental disorders (NDD). Comprehensive CNV analysis was performed in 287 Chinese children with mental retardation and/or development delay (MR/DD) and their unaffected parents. When compared with 5,866 ancestry-matched controls, 11~12% more MR/DD children carried rare and large CNVs. The increased CNV burden in MR/DD was predominantly due to de novo CNVs, the majority of which (62%) arose in the paternal germline. We observed a 2~3 fold increase of large CNV burden in the mothers of affected children. By implementing an evidence-based review approach, pathogenic structural variants were identified in 14.3% patients and 2.4% parents, respectively. Pathogenic CNVs in parents were all carried by mothers. The maternal transmission bias of deleterious CNVs was further replicated in a published dataset. Our study confirms the pathogenic role of rare CNVs in MR/DD, and provides additional evidence to evaluate the dosage sensitivity of some candidate genes. It also supports a population model of MR/DD that spontaneous mutations in males' germline are major contributor to the de novo mutational burden in offspring, with higher penetrance in male than female; unaffected carriers of causative mutations, mostly females, then contribute to the inherited mutational burden.